I’m stuck in bed today, wife’s orders. I had hoped that after a little rest I would start feeling better but since yesterday, since Friday really, I have just gotten worse. I’m not so much worried about this little cold as I am worried about what impact a passing cold can have on my chronic illness. Stressing my body can bring on a flare and if I go into a flare it would be like starting at square one again for my health. I’d be back on steroids, back to testing, back to doctor’s visits, and back to worrying constantly about what the next step is.

Of course, my doctor would tell me not to worry about that. She would tell me the worry was more likely to trigger an overactive immune response then the minor cold I’m fighting off. She would tell me that I’m doing good and that there isn’t even anything to worry about until that status changes. She would tell me to listen to my body, take care of myself, and relax and that is what I am going to try my best to do. I know how to get better and if I fail at that; I have people, both professionals and loved ones, that will get me through the next steps no matter what.


Published by

Lisa Marie Blair

Painfully aware. Profoundly afraid. Perpetually falling in and out of love with humanity. She/They.

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