One thing that has been bothering me is the way (straight) people reference how long my fiance and I have been living together before getting married as if it were a bad thing or some kind of failure. People seem to have forgotten that until just under 5 years ago, we couldn’t legally get married!
People seem to have forgotten that the distribution of rights were (and in some ways still are) very different, and are now holding us to a higher social and moral expectation than we could have achieved. It isn’t our fault we had to wait so long and bringing it up opens deep and painful wounds. It reminds us how much we are hated, and then shames us for it.