The medication is working but not all the time, yet. I’m still in pain in the mornings and the evenings but the middle of the day is a glimpse of glorious normalcy.

Usually I’m nearly normal with in two days so the fact that things are still so bad is scaring me a little. The last two times I’ve tapered off of steroids I had to keep going back up because my body could not stay in remission. I have a feeling this will be the case. Behind every positive step is another fear.

Still, the small relief I feel is everything and I am trying to focus on that. I tried to write, but the day started so late that nothing more than my coffee post will go up and even that will be disappointingly late. I’m hopeful for the rest of the week though. I will make progress on all fronts.

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Lisa Marie Blair

Painfully aware. Profoundly afraid. Perpetually falling in and out of love with humanity. She/They.

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