084//366

I’m feeling much, much better than I was yesterday, both physically and emotionally. I think I know now what happened and where the pain came from.

My GI doctor had called me while I was in the morphine haze and I didn’t quite catch it then but I remember now that she mentioned a bit of fluid in my abdomen that could be seen on the CT scan. She mentioned there may have been a cyst that ruptured, but she didn’t sound concerned. This morning I looked up the symptoms, and it sounds exactly like what I went through. I also posted in my ulcerative colitis support group and had a member confirm she had been through very similar and it was also a ruptured cyst.

I feel reassured and validated. I feel like it was reasonable to be seen by a medical professional and it was worth the trip to. I also feel angry. I’m angry that the nurses and doctors were so dismissive and that they rushed me out the way they did. I’m angry that I never get the answers I’m seeking from them. I’m angry for all the pain I’ve dealt with in the past because I was brushed off.

Physically I’m feeling better too. The pain is slowly dulling and dying away. I’m able to move around and I even got out of the house with my wife for some grocery shopping. And, I have to say, I’m really enjoying this social distancing thing. People are more polite, more respectful of boundaries, quieter. The general public has become pleasant to be around. I hope we all retain some of that niceness once the world and real life begin again.

Published by

Lisa Marie Blair

Painfully aware. Profoundly afraid. Perpetually falling in and out of love with humanity. She/They.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.