218 // Exhausted and on Edge

It’s been a hard week. Long hours and high expectations have me exhausted and on edge and have, regretfully, led to minor outbursts in the workplace. I’m ashamed, but there has been so little room for criticism or control that for my own sanity I have to release the pressure when I can.

I’m learning that there is a difference between being a leader and being a boss. Sometimes I get mixed up as to which I want to be and sometimes others get mixed up as to which one I am. One of my professional goals going forward is to be clear with which one I am and to clarify to the confused what that means for them.

It isn’t that I don’t want the work, it’s simply that I need the rest. It isn’t that I don’t know what to do, it’s that I don’t always want to decide. It isn’t that I’m the only one that can do it, I’ve only been the one who will. As a leader, I want to help my team cultivate confidence. I want them to know they can. I want them to want to lead too.

Published by

Lisa Marie Blair

Painfully aware. Profoundly afraid. Perpetually falling in and out of love with humanity. She/They.

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