120 // Returning

Today was a good writing day, but only because it was allowed to be an entirely unproductive work day. My bosses are often understanding of the need for days of rest and relief, days where there are no expectations, only time to take care of self or reconnect with the team. Today was one such day.

I wrote a new “Currently” post for the first time all year and tried my hand at drafting the first newsletter I’ve sent in years. I also shared a letter I wrote over a week ago to someone very dear to me. Between those pieces and these recent journal entries, a lot has been released. I’m lighter than I’ve felt in weeks.

The weekend looks busy from here, but instead of focusing on the tasks and to-dos I’m looking forward to getting back to rising before the sun and spending a few quiet hours over a cup of strong coffee and the lit up keys of my laptop. I’m looking forward to more writing.

Returning to written words has been like returning to an old friend, picking up where I left off and going on as if I’d never left. It’s a relief to be so accepted, to be loved back by something you thought had stopped loving you.

121//366

The weather is really starting to warm up now. Just a few weeks ago it was snowing and now I have to keep all the windows open or the house is unbearable by the time the sun makes its way to the west windows.

I had hoped to walk again this morning but my knee is stiff and hurting again so I spent much of the day laid up on the couch instead. I’d hoped to get outside again or to do a workout at home, but an afternoon nap snuck up on me and I lost too much time. I’d hoped to end the month on a more enthusiastic note. I hoped to write something good today and to finish reading the book I’ve been struggling to get through, but I watched mindless TV and did some virtual window shopping instead.

But tomorrow is a new day, and new month, and after I am done here, I’m going to write out exactly what kind of day I’d like it to be. A new month is nothing but another fresh start, the same as a new year, or season, or hour of every single day. So, no guilt and no regrets, only resolution and resolve. Begin again, begin again, again, again, again…