Well, I had hoped to spend the day downtown browsing exhibits at the Museum of Contemporary Art but I have so little physical or emotional energy that leaving the house doesn’t even sound enjoyable anymore. The weather is gorgeous and I have all the windows in the house open.

It’s been a long time since the place has been aired out. It’s been a long time since I have felt “aired out” too. We’re far from spring but that is where my mind is and where my heart longs to be. Today, even though I’m stuck inside, that is where I will pretend to be.

I’ve decided to simply rest today. I’ve given myself permission to waste time. I’m laying on the couch, eating nothing but snacks, reading nothing, writing nothing, and allowing myself all the screens and scrolling I want. I think one day here and there to indulge in all those things I’m trying so hard not to do every other day is important. One ultimate cheat day a month will keep me focused and keep my will power strong.


Published by

Lisa Marie Blair

Painfully aware. Profoundly afraid. Perpetually falling in and out of love with humanity. She/They.