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Today is a better day. It’s my birthday eve and I feel both very excited and very nervous. I’m excited for my own perfect day, or as perfect as my wife and I could make it. I’m excited to receive some gifts and to eat some delicious food but I’m nervous to start a new year of my life and I’m also a little sad to end this one.

It’s a day full of anticipation. I’m living entirely for tomorrow right now, but I’m doing my best to come back and to make this day its own. I made a little time to write and mustered the motivation too. I didn’t finish anything of significance, but I did work on a few pieces sitting in my drafts. I had hoped to post so much more than I have, but I am not counting this as a failure but as a reminder.

I have never been very good at blogging challenges and I don’t particularly like them much either. They are a wonderful motivator though and even if I don’t post anything else more than my little journal entries for the rest of the month, I will feel like I have won. I’ve already written more in these 11 days than I have in over a year.

I will still keep at it, for the rest of the month at least, but I’m not sure daily blogging will every be something I am capable of. Maybe if I change the things I am posting. I’m considering ending my Weekend Coffee Shares. I write these little updates every day and I really would like to spend my weekends writing other things instead.

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Lisa Marie Blair

Painfully aware. Profoundly afraid. Perpetually falling in and out of love with humanity. She/They.

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